Tag: accident

Andrea goes over her handlebars

Date #350 – Saturday, July 19, 2014

A: After writing about date #349, I am so completely worked up that I don’t even want to THINK about this day. This awful day. I just want to cry. Again. This bike accident has been really difficult. Most days, moments, conversations, I am well and positive and proud of my recovery and my luck. I am happy to have had B there, that I memorized his phone number and that he stood beside me the entire time. He never once left my side for almost an entire week. He was and is the most supportive, understanding, and caring person in my life. He went so far out of his way to make sure that I was and would be okay, it makes me feel so unbelievably lucky, I can’t even tell you. I wrote about what happened this day on my blog, so I won’t repeat it here, but if I could tell B one thing, it’d be that I’ve never felt so loved in my entire life, by someone other than my mother, than I did this day and week. Thank you.

B: When I got the call I was in the middle of photographing coffee. I never actually drank the drink I was taking pictures of, I found it a week later. I don’t even know why I thought to pick up the phone early on a Saturday morning, but I did.

The caller didn’t allude to memory loss, or a bloody face, as they calmly said, “Your partner has been in an accident. She’s OK, just a bit shaky.” Then, as I arrived to the scene, reality began to set in. I hoped the ambulance wasn’t for her. I hoped the blood wasn’t real, or at least wasn’t from a loss of teeth.

Then I heard her scarred voice, “Where am I?” “What’s going on?” A didn’t know what happened. I didn’t know. Thankfully three bystanders were there and helping. They told me what they knew. The one who called assured me that things would be OK (he was also in an accident). The two others helped me lock up her bike and then gave me her tooth.

As we rode to the hospital the paramedic and I worked to keep A calm. The paramedic was INCREDIBLE as he would ask basic questions and A would panic as details became confusing. 

The ten minutes in the emergency waiting room were hell. A, inside, me outside unsure of what was happening. When I came inside and she made a joke I knew things would be OK. A is so strong and amazing and hilarious. I couldn’t believe she was making jokes. I wanted to take a picture of her because I didn’t think she would believe how bad she looked. I said, “it looks like you’ve been in a bad fight.” She eventually looked (it was way worse than what you see above…missing teeth, lots of dried blood).

Oddly, the most frantic I felt was taking A’s bra off  while the X-ray technicians waited outside the room. I felt rushed and pathetically useless. Otherwise, I was surprised at how naturally calm I felt helping her clean her mouth or take her to the bathroom.

There was a panicky moment where we were checking out and we had to find an emergency dentist and I thought, “This is it. We have to be adults now. No one is going to solve this problem for us.” It was odd.

I’m so thankful for all the people that were there to help A. I’m happy the memory loss was temporary. I’m happy that A is so strong and incredible and courageous. I’m happy her Mom and Uncle came up and drove us around.

Things happen and you can’t plan for them and you can’t predict them. Life happens and sometimes all you can do is look around and choose whether you’re going to count the good things or the bad ones.

He’s “okay” – a car ran a red and smack!

An awful date #302 – Wednesday, June 4, 2014

A: Worst. Date. Ever.

We were biking back to my apartment after our Ecojot meeting and, literally on my block, a woman driving a car wasn’t paying attention and ran a red, hitting Brian. I screamed seconds before because I saw the car which likely prompted the woman to break but she still made contact with an unsuspecting Brian who was in front of me. His butt smashed the windshield and his bike is pretty much totalled. It was horrific and traumatic to see.

I was hit by a car in 2007 and it’s become this giant grey cloud that I constantly think about. It’s effected every aspect of my life and I was immediaely worried about the long term affects that this may have on B. But B’s body and mind are not mine and I am proud of him for responding and being as strong as we was.

I finally understand what my friends went through when they saw my accident. They had a harder time than I did, and I think I might have a harder or just as hard time as B with this particular experience. Thinking of how life can change on whim has once again reminded me that we are just… temporary.

B: I don’t think a lot about death but I do think a lot about my life. I think about the impact I want to have on this world and how every choice I make is a part of that affect.

When the car hit me it was sudden. I remember A’s piercing scream and the wheels screeching. In my head I just thought “Oh fuck, am I seriously now on top of a car?” When I came off the hood I was in shock. People often talk about “fight or flight” response but they forget that there is also a freeze response. I just stood there and stared at the woman.

I’m so happy A was there. She helped direct the driver to a side street, she helped get me in the ambulance and told the paramedics that I needed to be X-rayed (which should always happen after a hit). She called my Mom and rode with me to the hospital. 

I feel so lucky that I am alive, I wouldn’t want to leave A.